Nov 12, 2014

The Vitruvian Sisters, Who Only Bought Perfectly Normal Art for Perfectly Normal People like Themselves

I smoked too much while I waited for the spy birds to come back. I must have that Pierluigi Carbonnaro that my sister got from her husband, or my name is not Incuria! Its blandness was to me the tepid embers of God’s drowsy mumblings on the eighth day. Or night. Oh, what horrid indifference that banal painting inspired! It must be mine.

Incuria Vitruvia
by John Magnet Bell


She lucked into a remarkable husband, did Nefasta. Not only does Pigsour not mind her four noses, but he only rises from the grave at Pentecost, and always bearing gifts! Gifts, eh, of a cultivated sort, gifts that demand no reaction, neither joy nor disappointment. Could they possibly be more normal? In medio stat virtus, says the inscription on Pigsour’s casket. What a man! What a wraith! What a paragon of death’s uncaring handiwork!

Nefasta Vitruvia
by John Magnet Bell

The Vitruvian sisters are a Photoshop collage I created from a portrait by William-Adolphe Bouguereau. He loved depicting the female form, which he did often -- there are more than 800 works to his name. Bouguereau's work fell out of favor in the early twentieth century, but has since been rediscovered and reevaluated. 

The Vitruvian Sisters
by John Magnet Bell

They look great on a tote bag!

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