Aug 20, 2014

Don’t Be a Fool! Make the Most of Your Spam to Master Your Ultimate Writing Mojo

Let’s see, what’s in the spam folder today? A person named Kaylee Stokes offers me the opportunity to become a “shagadelic Casanova.” Um, person, in my field of expertise we call that pleonasm. The very prospect of an un-shagadelic Casanova threatens to make the universe implode. What use would it have for a dickless Casanova?

An entity called Birith Weksdas, or something, informs me that my robot-building license has expired. Thank you for the heads-up and the stern admonishments that followed — no, wait, Weksdas just wanted me to look at a website that sells “Cilais.” So no admonishments.

Pictured: A Cilais. Possibly.

The Beast in the Garden, by Sebastian Feraut

I have been drawn to emails from merchants with the dubious promise of "yes, we have no atomic bombs." Pals I never knew I had wrote to me saying, "Our best friend has been arrested; sign up here for free newsletters."

But what am I getting at? A simple point, no more. You can harness the power of spam, its beauty — yes, sometimes spam is beautiful — to generate powerful, poetic, whimsical stories, poems… and blog posts. Think of spam as raw material for existentialist comedy. Just don’t click on any of the links it offers and you’ll be fine.

Now I wonder, does anybody blog about spam? Not from a securitarian/marketing/SEO standpoint, but its clandestine poetics?

To my delight, yes, people have and people do. I found
On the Strange Poetics of Spam
Poetics of Spam
The Poetics of Spam (Sample quote: “This article made me feel shines.”)
Artist Clare Yow, who collects spam quotes and creates visuals for them

Got any favorite spam of your own? Let me know.

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